How do you deal with anxiety?
In this episode of the Ikigai Podcast, Nick speaks with Catherine Deeks Gnocchi about reframing anxiety as meaningful, adaptive information rather than a problem to eliminate.
Podcast Highlights
- Anxiety and empathy as evolutionary traits. Catherine explains how anxiety and empathy evolved to help humans survive and connect with others.
- Anxiety as meaningful information. Catherine discusses how anxiety is something that needs to be understood.
- The role of self-awareness in emotional regulation. Catherine explains how becoming self-aware is the key to befriending anxiety.
- Link between anxiety and empathy. Catherine shares the results of her study exploring the relationship between anxiety and empathy.
- Integrating ikigai and ibasho in therapy. Catherine shares how she uses the concepts of ikigai and ibasho with her clients.
- Kindfulness: mindfulness with compassion. Catherine explains the idea of kindfulness.
Catherine Deeks Gnocchi
Catherine Deeks Gnocchi is a therapist and educator who focuses on emotional well-being, self-awareness, and life satisfaction. Her work draws on ikigai, mindfulness-based psychotherapy, and evolutionary psychology. In June 2025, she completed a Master of Science in Psychology, researching the evolutionary roots of anxiety and empathy.
Catherine is an Associate Member therapist at the International Mental Health and Counselling Clinic in Tokyo and the founder of Estibasho. Through her work, she helps people understand anxiety as meaningful information and develop emotional balance, clear values, and a sense of purpose and belonging. She is also one of the most successful coaches in the Ikigai Tribe.
Anxiety and empathy as evolutionary traits
“Anxiety helps us to survive, whereas empathy helps us to thrive.” - Catherine Deeks Gnocchi
Central to Catherine’s perspective is the idea that both anxiety and empathy are adaptive evolutionary traits. Anxiety evolved to support survival by alerting humans to threats and activating the sympathetic nervous system, enabling fight, flight, freeze, or fawn responses. Empathy, in contrast, evolved to support social cohesion, caregiving, and cooperation by activating the parasympathetic nervous system—the state associated with rest, recovery, and connection.
Rather than being opposing forces, anxiety and empathy work together to help humans both survive and thrive.
Anxiety as meaningful information
“Anxiety is not a disorder; when it is understood, it can really be your friend.” - Catherine Deeks Gnocchi
One of Catherine’s key messages is that anxiety should not be viewed solely as a disorder. When understood, anxiety can function as meaningful information—a signal pointing toward something that matters.
In modern life, anxiety is rarely triggered by physical danger. Instead, it often reflects internal conflicts, such as misalignment with personal values, threats to authenticity, or unresolved emotional patterns formed earlier in life. By becoming mindful of anxiety’s triggers and underlying causes, individuals can respond more intentionally rather than reacting automatically.
From this perspective, anxiety becomes a guide rather than an enemy.
The role of self-awareness in emotional regulation
Self-awareness plays a critical role in Catherine’s therapeutic approach. Understanding personal values, strengths, and roles allows individuals to recognize whether a perceived threat is real or rooted in past experiences and learned beliefs.
“Awareness helps us ask: is the threat really there, or is this a learned response?” - Nicholas Kemp
Many anxious reactions are shaped by early coping strategies developed to avoid shame, rejection, or conflict. While these strategies may once have been protective, they often persist long after they stop being helpful. Without awareness, people remain stuck in habitual reactions that no longer serve them.
Practices such as ikigai reflection, mindfulness, and values-based inquiry help create space between stimulus and response, enabling more flexible, compassionate, and values-aligned behavior.
Link between anxiety and empathy
Catherine’s master’s dissertation explored the relationship between anxiety and two types of empathy: cognitive empathy (understanding another person’s perspective) and affective empathy (emotionally resonating with another’s experience). While her study did not reveal a strong direct correlation between anxiety and empathy, it uncovered an interesting pattern—both anxiety and empathy tended to increase as students progressed through university.
This finding suggests that as responsibilities, uncertainty, and future pressures increase, so too do emotional awareness and social sensitivity. Even when statistically independent, anxiety and empathy remain essential traits for adaptation, resilience, and personal growth.
Integrating ikigai and ibasho in therapy
Ikigai plays a foundational role in Catherine’s work with clients. Rather than focusing on achievement, income, or status, ikigai emphasizes meaning derived from small, everyday sources—relationships, nature, roles, and simple moments of satisfaction.
Closely related is the Japanese concept of ibasho, often described as a place or state of belonging. Catherine helps clients cultivate not only physical or social ibasho, but personal ibasho—the ability to be authentically oneself across different roles and environments.
When authenticity is compromised, anxiety often intensifies. When values are honored, anxiety tends to soften.
Kindfulness: mindfulness with compassion
The conversation also highlighted the concept of kindfulness, which combines mindfulness with kindness. Being present creates the conditions for compassion, particularly toward oneself. Catherine noted that while many people are highly skilled at self-criticism, they are often less practiced in self-soothing.
Kindfulness encourages individuals to notice their internal experiences without judgment and to respond with care rather than harshness.
Conclusion
Anxiety does not necessarily indicate something is wrong. Often, it signals that something important is seeking attention. Through awareness, kindness, and values-aligned living, anxiety can transform from a source of distress into a guide for growth. Anxiety, when understood, can become a powerful ally in living a meaningful life.