Do you have the mental space for peace of mind?
Amidst the hustle and bustle of daily life, self-care can often be neglected. In Japan, there's a concept known as yutori, which encourages creating mental space—an approach you can adopt and integrate into your own life in this fast-paced world.
In this episode of the Ikigai Podcast, Nick Kemp explores a sub-theory of ikigai known as yutori, offering insights on how it can enhance your well-being and encourage self-care.
Podcast Highlights
- An ikigai paradox. Nick discusses the various perspectives of Japanese people on ikigai.
- Having positive sources of ikigai. Nick talks about how having positive sources of ikigai can help people deal with health issues.
- The concept of yutori. Nick talks about the concept of yutori and how it can be a form of self-care.
- Lack of ikigai and yutori in Japan. Nick shares how some Japanese people struggle with a lack of yurori and ikigai.
- Attaining yutori. Nick talks about ways people can practice yutori in their lives.
An ikigai paradox
First, let’s dive in with an ikigai paradox. Ikigai is generally understood as the life affirming sources in your life that make life feel worth living. However, for many Japanese, their ikigai, their ikigai sources, are coping mechanisms. If you were to ask some Japanese what their ikigai is, some may respond by stating cigarettes or alcohol. In fact, when I first started researching ikigai I asked my Japanese friends to define ikigai and one offered the following.
“It’s late on a Friday night and two salary men walk into a bar and quickly order two beers. They are both exhausted. It’s been another brutal week of long hours and stress. When their beers arrive they both pick up their glass, clink glasses and say otsukaresma to acknowledge each other’s hard work and contribution for the week. After taking a sip, one says to the other “Ah, this is my ikigai!” While it might seem comical, for some Japanese that first sip of beer after a hard day’s work might feel life affirming, a cue to finally relax, clear the mind and be in the moment.
Clearly, drinking alcohol or smoking cigarettes is something we wouldn’t associate to well-being or self-care, but Japanese may argue and in fact have argued, that if these vices bring you comfort and relief then they are sources of ikigai one could rely on to process stress and the challenges in life.
The point I want to make is that some sources of ikigai can be unhealthy and we should avoid as much as possible in engaging with them, be they alcohol, cigarettes, junk food, binge watching TV and so on. These could be considered negative sources of ikigai.
Having positive sources of ikigai
Ideally we want to have ikigai sources that nurture well being.
On episode 28, Dr. Yasuhiro Kotera shared that having ikigai helps address the physiological burden that a person experiences and what that burden can accumulate. The tiredness or fatigue that can accumulate with a stressed mind or not having an ikigai, can lead to poor health outcomes such as cardiovascular disease or other stress-related health problems.
Yasuhiro points out that having positive sources of ikigai, such as exercise, hobbies, and friendships, helps people deal with health problems. People with ikigai are most likely to engage in healthy habits or self-care behaviours. This can lead to a virtuosic cycle. If you have ikigai, you’ll engage in healthy behaviour; if you engage in healthy behaviour, you’ll have a better mindset; having a better mindset can help you find more ikigai, and you’ll be able to engage in even more healthier behaviours. So these are the types of ikigai sources we want to engage in, healthy behaviours that promote a positive mindset to seek and engage in more healthy behaviours. However, we don’t want to overdo it.
The concept of yutori
Well-being and self-care can also be about doing nothing, and this leads us to a sub-theory of ikigai called yutori.
Like ikigai, yutori is a difficult word to translate concisely because it is a peculiar, multifaceted word used in various contexts. The online dictionary jisho.org translates yutori as ‘space; elbowroom; leeway; room; reserve; margin; allowance; latitude; time (to spare)’.I personally tend to think of yutori as ‘the space to have peace of mind’. It is important for ikigai, and in that context could be defined as ‘a psychological state in which one feels a sense of wellbeing and life satisfaction’.
Yutori is a concept I discussed with Dr. Dean Fido on episode 12 of the Ikigai podcast. It is an item of the Ikigai-9 Scale translated as ‘I have room in my mind’. Listen to that episode to learn the 8 other items. So ‘room’ and yutori are equivalent because, when you have yutori, you feel a sense of mental space and a freedom from overwhelming thoughts or worries; you have room to think about life and room to consider others. In our fast-paced modern world where we are often distracted or glued to our mobile devices, I suspect yutori is a state few of us enjoy in our day-to-day living; we are often waiting for the weekend or next holiday to find this space.
‘Financially, Japan has attained a standard of living at which most people can obtain at least minimum satisfaction. Many Japanese people, however, do not feel real fulfilment and satisfaction in their daily lives. ‘No yutori can be found in our daily life’ is an expression often used among Japanese people.’17
Their results indicated that yutori was related not only to objective, material measures, such as time and economic sufficiency, but also to very subjective psychological concepts – particularly contentment:
‘Contentment was the core factor of yutori in the model…while material factors such as free time, economic wealth, and environmental amenities acted in support. The findings indicated that the higher contentment people obtained, the more psychological factors, such as enjoyment, behavioral freedom, and challenge, were promoted. Time and economic factors contribute yutori because they enhance people’s control of their environment. Therefore, a state of yutori is not only the result of material, objective factors that arise when the fundamental conditions are met, but it is also a subjective and psychological concept.’18Lack of ikigai and yutori in Japan
Ironically, even though the Japanese value yutori and ikigai and have tools that are useful for identifying and promoting both, the country still suffers greatly from a lack of yutori – especially in the workplace, with hundreds of workers literally working themselves to death every year. The problem is so common that the Japanese language has a word to describe this tragic occurrence: karōshi, with karō meaning ‘overwork’ and shi meaning ‘death’– death from overwork. Suicide induced by work stress is also a problem in Japan; this is known as karōshi-jisatsu, with jisatsu meaning ‘suicide’. Clearly, Japan has a lack of yutori when it comes to work life. This is something we want to avoid and highlights why we must not make our work our only source of ikigai.Attaining yutori
Yutori is not about creating space to do more things. You don’t need to partake in activities like meditation, journaling, or tai chi to create yutori. You simply slow things down. You slow down to create a feeling that you have plenty of space in between your activities, resulting in a mindset with more latitude.
I feel yutori when I go for a walk at my ibasho, a place I will introduce you to in the next chapter. When I go on this walk I don’t take my phone. I also don’t take this walk for the purpose of exercise; it is something I do purely for the sake of creating yutori. I slow down to allow myself to savour the sights and sounds around me. I don’t rush; there is no concern for time.
Japanese will often use the example of leaving your home early enough to get somewhere, like the train station, so that you know you’re going to arrive early. On your walk to the train station, if you bump into a neighbour, you know you have plenty of time up your sleeve to have a chat. There is no discomfort, no sense of urgency, no need to rush. You don’t arrive early by going fast; you leave early to arrive early.
If you feel you lack yutori in your life, try making a conscious effort to divorce yourself from your mobile devices every evening and either engage in activities that will make you feel content, or simply, do nothing at all. Perhaps you could dim the lights in your room and reflect on your thoughts. So create time to be present and always enjoy the small joys of life.
So, in a nutshell, we can understand and use yutori as a self care practice, do less in your life, and give yourself the room to have peace of mind.
