Do Things That Lift Your Spirits

When faced with difficult situations, we might get some advice from people, professionals, or even self-help books on things we must do to improve our situation. Seeking help or advice from others may be helpful, but at the end of the day, we are the ones who know ourselves better; and the best way we handle those situations is to be in touch with our values.

Trudy Boyle discusses why it is essential to pay attention to one's self when faced with difficult situations.

Trudy: Sometimes what happens is that there are people who go through cancer and do amazing things. They're really kind of action figures. They're amazing. 

And sometimes people who are in my workshops will say: “But I don't know how they do it. I could never be going through pancreatic cancer, having treatment and doing an iron woman.” 

And I would say: “Did you ever want to do this before you had cancer? And she said, “Well, no.” I said, “Well, why would you think you would need to do this now?” 

So we need to pay attention to ourselves a lot of the time. The culture kind of imposes what you should do when you get cancer, you should eat this, and you shouldn't eat that, and you should do this, you should do yoga, even if it makes you dizzy. 

And I'm not against any of that. I'm all for a healthy lifestyle. But at the same time, you need to pay attention to your own blueprint, who you are, and do the things that really are helpful and useful to you. And not just what the report says needs to be done.

Nick: We all know that we're the one person who knows ourselves best. And so I think if we listen to our intuition and follow our values, and take advice and process it, but eyes come back to a decision we're comfortable with, it's probably the best way to handle any situation.

Trudy: If you pay attention, you will know that but if you're not, if you're kind of just in a fog, and not noticing, and just doing what people say.

I'll tell you one quick story of a woman who was in one of my workshops, and I'm free to tell this story. She had said, during this workshop, “You know, I really have to say that I don't like yoga, and I don't like yoga music. And I feel like now I have to do this, I have to do this because I have cancer.” 

And I said, “Well, what kind of music do you like?” And she said, “I like heavy metal.” So I said, “When you go home today, why don't you sit down and play heavy metal and have a glass of red wine if you want.”

And so she wrote to me and she said, “I just had that glass of red wine and banged on heavy metal on my piano. And I haven't felt so good in months.” So you see, this is tricky, that's a slippery slope. 

When we see these are sort of the things you should do because you have cancer. They don't suit you at all. We have our medical treatments, but we have a lot of leeway in the non medical areas of what works for me or you or someone else. 

And I encourage people to pay attention to that. And to do more of those things that really do lift your spirits.