Why Ikigai Matters: Insights from Yohei Nakajima

*Watch the full playlist above.

Feeling A Sense of Purpose

People in the West incorporate ikigai with something grand -- achieving big goals in life. However, for the Japanese people, ikigai can be anything that makes you feel alive. Yohei shares his definition of ikigai: it is all about feeling a sense of purpose.

One-sentence definition of ikigai

Nick: Let's begin talking about this amazing blog post you wrote. You write that there are words in the Japanese language that have shaped the way you think and ikigai was one of these words, and I felt you really encapsulated ikigai in this one blog post.

So if you were pushed to provide a one-sentence definition on ikigai, do you think you could do that?

Yohei: Yes. I think it's about a sense of purpose, feeling a sense of purpose. I specifically say feeling a sense of purpose separate from purpose because it is used casually.

I can imagine being on a fishing boat with a friend and seeing the waves and seeing the sun and catching a fish and looking over and saying, Wow, this really gives me a sense of ikigai -- the sense of purpose, living in a moment that makes you feel alive.

That's what I think ikigai is about, it's the sense of having a purpose and a sense of living, a sense of being present. I think for some people it can tie to your actual purpose in life if you do find one, but I don't think it has to be that by any means.

Feeling Your Ikigai

Kamiya Mieko, a pioneering researcher of ikigai, stated that there are two ways to use the word ikigai: the source of ikigai or the feeling of ikigai -- ikigai-kan. Yohei explains how ikigai is more of a feeling -- the moment that makes people appreciate life.

The moment that makes you appreciate life

Nick: In my research, especially with a writer, and someone who I like to refer to as the mother of ikigai psychology, Kamiya Mieko, she describes that there are two ways to use the word ikigai.

She offers an example that when someone says, this child is my ikigai, it refers to the source or target of ikigai. She's a psychiatrist, so she's framing it like that. Then when one feels ikigai, it's a state of mind, or this awareness or this feeling: ikigai-kan. 

You talk about feeling your ikigai in your blog post, would you like to also touch on that?

Yohei: Yeah, I think feeling ikigai as I mentioned is that sense of life, the moment makes you appreciate life. It's something that I think we all strive for. And again, this can be in a moment, this can be doing something that you love repeating, or as I mentioned, it could be something that you've done for the first time.

I think actually sometimes you get the most sense of fulfilment in life when you do something for the first time, which is counter-intuitive to purpose because you assume that purpose is something that you do over and over but I think to live a full life is not just to do the same thing over and over again, but to experience different parts of life.

Then I caveat that again, it does depend on the person. I think anybody can feel ikigai from anything. There are no set rules on if it's something that has to be done often, or if it's something that you do once, but it is something that gives you an appreciation for being in this world.

That feeling wherever it comes from, I think is what we strive for and what I think of when I think of feeling ikigai.

Nick: Yeah, I agree. I also like how you wrote that people who are around other people who have ikigai can almost feel it, hinting that it's contagious.

Searching For Your Ikigai

For Yohei, attaining ikigai is a journey. Not feeling a sense of ikigai is not a bad thing, instead, it's an opportunity to find things that will give you a sense of purpose.

Look for ikigai in places you haven't looked before

Nick: So I think my audience, Yohei, would be wanting to find their ikigai. You write about how it's a journey and something you search for. And it's something I know you obviously went through. So would you like to touch on that?

Yohei: I think it's cliché to quote that it's about the journey, not the end. But life is a journey. There's no moment that I think you're living toward it. I think you're constantly looking to appreciate life as it is.

A constant search is life itself and that's what I'm referring to. For some people, there are moments in life where you wake up and you don't know what's next. It might be a quarter-life or midlife crisis or it could just be a slump that you're going through. 

Whenever I have a slump, I always remember that that's an opportunity for me to look for ikigai in places I haven't looked before. Then when you do find it, you dive into it, and you wake up every morning excited that you have something to look forward to.

And I think some people when they don't feel that ikigai when they wake up, and they're just not excited about life, not excited about what's happening during the day, I think it's important to remember that it is about the search, it is about finding and it's great that if you find it and get to do it.

But not feeling ikigai is not a bad thing. It's an opportunity to look for ikigai in places you haven't looked before.

Nick: You've reminded me of one aspect that I've learned from Kamiya Mieko about ikigai that it's about fulfilment, having this idea you have life fulfilment, and that even in times where life is hard and you're struggling if you believe your life is moving forward in a positive direction, you can feel ikigai at that moment.

And it does help you to continue and live your journey or in a sense, you don't proactively search every day for your ikigai but you do look for meaning in your life. And you do want a sense of purpose. 

And that if we do reach states of boredom, or frustration, as you said, it's probably a sign for us to try something new or be proactive.

Yohei: I think it's called the hedonist cycle, the idea that we have ups and downs but on average, we're just the same.

I kind of buy into that concept to some extent, to the extent that we do have ups and downs but I think being the nerdy person that I am, if you graph it out, I think the average can slowly increase. 

Over time If you look back 10 years from now, as your life on average has the last three years been better than the three years 10 years ago? I tend to look at it that way.

So that even if I am feeling down, I just remember, it's part of the cycles of ups and downs, just like there are summer and winter. But on average, is my life improving?

When asked me that question, the answer tends to be yes, granted, I feel blessed that I get to say that. But I think it is important to have a long term view when it comes to finding purpose or ikigai in addition to a short term view as well.

A Hack To Finding Ikigai

How do we know when we've found ikigai? For Yohei, people will feel it when they find ikigai; and a better way of finding ikigai is by knowing what role you play in your community because figuring out your part in the society gives you a sense of purpose.

Looking for that role within your various tribes

Nick: It's interesting how we're having this conversation and how we started with this idea that ikigai in the West was this sweet spot of finding something that you love, that you're good at, that the world needs and you can be paid for.

And what we're discussing and you're sharing is ikigai will come and go, it'll change over time and your life has these ups and downs.

So ikigai is not this sweet spot to try and hope that you'll get to one day, it's actually something we can find and my question is, how do we know when we've found it? 

Yohei: When you find it, you feel it. Specifically, I touch on a little trick that I think works and this is candidly a little bit of my take on purpose and ikigai is that I believe that we as humans are inherently social creatures. 

Today we have multiple tribes. Historically in the past, you had a village and you had your one tribe. Today, we have a lot of different tribes and within that tribe, I think all of us have a character that we embody, within that tribe, your role within that community.

Within a family you could be the jokester father, or at work you could be the silly coworker or the heads down, the guy who gets it down, or the guy who's always called, even in the case of emergency.

But we all have this role that we play within a tribe. I think looking for that role within your various tribes is, I call it a hack to finding ikigai, because it gives you a sense of purpose within that tribe, within your community.

Nick: That part of your article was what made me so happy because it was like the missing piece.

I was desperately trying to understand ikigai, been doing a lot of research and then I found your article and when I read those last few paragraphs about understanding your role in your community, in your personal community, it just made so much sense because we have roles, and we live our values through our roles. 

I think one important aspect of ikigai is, you want to be living your life in line with your values. So if you're a playful, loving father and you are that role, you'll have a feeling of ikigai.

But if for whatever reason you're stressed and you're under a lot of pressure and one night you come home and your kids want to play and you get upset or angry. A few seconds after that moment and minutes, maybe hours after that moment, you'll have this regret, because you have expressed yourself in opposition to your values.

So I think this was the biggest takeaway for me from your blog posts that we have roles to play in our tribes and it's important we find these roles and live them. 

That's really the best advice because there are many best selling books that say “ikigai; the Japanese secret to a long and happy life”, but they don't really offer a way for you to find it other than saying eat well, exercise, have many friends.

But they don't offer something you can really think about and reflect on and think, what is my role in my family? Or what is my role in my circle of friends, or in my workplace, or as an entrepreneur? So that was very helpful and it really was the reason why I reached out to you.

For the Japanese, Ikigai is not a special word

Ikigai has been gaining attention in the West, where people are trying to understand what it really means. However, in Japan, ikigai is a common term used in their daily conversations. Yohei shares that the casual use of the word is powerful as it allows people to approach and find their ikigai casually -- anything that motivates them in their daily living.

Japanese people approach ikigai casually

Nick: One thing you touched on earlier, and this will probably shock our audiences is that while the concept is important and deeply personal, the word ikigai to Japanese is not actually a special word. It's used in daily conversation and it's not a self-help word.

Yohei: You mentioned earlier that Japanese languages impacted me but it wasn't something I noticed until much later in life.

As I look back on the Japanese language, I think linguistics is fascinating, and it is a sign that Japan is a very Shinto Buddhist culture. We don't talk about being religious that much in Japan.

But what I've noticed is that in these proverbs that are regularly used in the language, even in the characters that are used to represent specific words, a lot of the values are embedded in the language itself. 

Ikigai was one of those words that I never thought of as an important word. It is just a word that we use. "Oh, doing this is exciting, you really feel a sense of ikigai", is really just like, "Oh, I feel alive", that's something we would casually say.

In Japan, it's used casually enough, here you won't say "oh, this makes me feel a sense of purpose". That's not what you say, you just say I feel alive. 

I think that casual use of the word is pretty powerful because it allows people to approach it casually as well. It's not something that you should stress about whether or not you're finding your ikigai or not, but it's something that does come and go.

It is casual in some sense. It can be fleeting, and of course, there's a deeper meaning if you can find an ikigai, in this case, a subject that you live the rest of your life with and that's exciting.

But to your point, I think the casualness of using a word that has so much deep meaning is what I thought was really powerful about the way ikigai is used in Japan.

Nick: That seems to be typical of Japanese culture. When I think about religion in Japan, rather than belief, it seems to be more custom based, and Japanese have all these customs that they practice related to the religion.

But they never really express a love for Buddha or a love for any Shinto gods, but they're very respectful in how they maintain these customs. 

I know when parents or family members die, every number of years Japanese go back to the grave, they'll clean it, they'll often visit the grave. That's a custom that most Japanese are happy to do and do.

Whereas in the West, we don't do those sorts of things. Very rarely would we regularly go back to our parent’s graves and clean their graves.

I've noticed Japanese do rather than talk about these concepts, and the best way probably to observe Japanese culture is to definitely live in Japan, but observe Japanese, rather than trying to ask them what does ikigai mean, what does wabi sabi mean? 

There is this mystique to all these Japanese words in the West. It's astounding how ikigai has become so popular.

People who contacted me asked me to offer a coaching program to certify them as ikigai coaches, and it's quite amazing how something that Japanese grew up with, has become this global phenomenon outside of Japan and most Japanese don't even know about it.

For the full podcast conversation, go to: Why Ikigai Is The Most Honourable and Rewarding Thing One Can Do